It's raining on my house and none of the others

The diet is going particularly well today. I had tea and cake at Maison B this afternoon and then bought 3 different types of celulite gell from Boots on the way home. I am not loving myself or my life today although the bit where I was actually eating the cake was pretty pleasurable. Work is dragging me down, on the whole its going alright but there are moments (of clarity) when I think, 'what the fuck are you doing here and what the fuck are you talking about ?'

I am worried about the following issues,
My weight - today I ate one small superfood salad from M & S, one hot chocolate from Artisan Choclatiere (I blame the rain - I had to run into Selfridges for shelter) one strawberry and cream choux pastry and 4 rice cakes and humous.
My tan fading and going back to Miami in general - not sure when I can go because not sure when getting paid, worried that if I don't buy ticket now then it will be more expensive when I do get paid.
Money in general - fairly convinced that I don't have enough life skills, self discipline or earning potential to survive at all.